July 6, 2026 at 9:49 am by Choice Recovery Coaching
Freedom is one of those words that means something different depending on where we have been, what we have survived, and what we are still carrying. For some people, freedom may mean leaving a country or situation where they were physically limited in what they could do, see, feel, or express. Coming to a place like the United States may bring a sense of relief, space, and possibility.
For others who are used to expressing themselves freely, freedom can feel more complicated right now.
In the U.S., we often look at freedom through a political lens. And with so much discord across the country, many people feel that political freedom is further from reality than it has been in a long time. Since we cannot control all of those outside forces, I have been exploring other ways in which we can.
The Stoics believed freedom was not about wanting or getting more physical things, but about being free from wanting them. Not wanting the flashier car, the eighth pair of shoes, or the extra cookie can be its own kind of freedom. Not because those things are bad, but because being controlled by wanting is its own kind of shackle. This is what the Stoics called internal freedom.
Freedom also looks different from one person’s life to another. A job, relationship, family, or home may feel supportive and freeing for one person, while someone else may feel tied down by finances, emotions, expectations, or the need for approval. What looks like stability from the outside may feel like pressure on the inside.
For a long time, I thought freedom meant being able to do whatever I wanted and go wherever I wanted. But the truth is, I have been tethered to my loved ones for most of my life. Their fears, circumstances, and approval all affected me. Sometimes that bond was love. Sometimes it was responsibility. Sometimes it was fear. Most of the time, it was a mix of all three and then some!
Now, 18 years into my journey, freedom feels different. It is less about escaping everything and more about building a life rooted in my own values. It is learning where I end and others begin. It is loving people without being controlled by their fear or my thoughts of them. It is creating a home and an existence based on the circumstances I have worked hard to create for myself.
Seneca said, “We suffer more often in imagination than in reality.” That one lands for me. So much of what keeps us stuck can live in the stories we tell ourselves, the fears we rehearse, and the future problems we try to solve before they even happen. Based on this, I feel so much closer, yet, still so far from being free.
Maybe freedom is not always about being untethered. Maybe it is about noticing what we are tied to, deciding what is rooted in love and what is rooted in fear, and loosening the things that keep us from becoming who we are meant to be.
How do you define freedom, and where are you with it today?
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